Jeb's Really Cool Things to Do - Eating Nails?

Presidential candidate, Jeb Bush, complained recently, "I have a lot of really cool things that I can do" other than run for president.

 It's difficult for me to imagine Jeb doing anything "really cool," but then his  concept of "really cool" is probably different from mine. In a previous post, I suggested that he would probably not consider working for Habitat for Humanity as "really cool."

Let's look at some "really cool things" he might consider:

1. make more money -- pretty easy to do when you are born into wealth.

2. remind your Brother, George W, that he owes you since you, as Florida governor, stole the 2000 election and put him in the White house.


3.buy some "really cool" cowboy boots to add to his collection, although he has never worked on a ranch or farm.

4. hire a ghost writer to write his "autobiography," just like big brother, George W. Bush.

5. go to work for Fox News and try to revise history by convincing viewers that George's Iraq Invasion was a good idea.

6. follow George's retirement plan , take art classes, and paint nude portraits of yourself.

7. spend more time playing fantasy football since he already bragged in the last debate  how well his "team" was doing..

8. hang out with his "Swift Boat Veterans" and congratulate them once again for lying about John Kerry in 2004. Of course they can't share war stories because Jeb was never in the military and the only battlefield the "veterans" saw was the Alamo memorial.

9. explain his illegal and unconstitutional interference as governor in the Terri Sciavo case.

10. swim in the St.John's River, "Florida's American Heritage River," and deny that the Koch brothers' Georgia Pacific plant is daily dumping millions of gallons of toxic waste into the river.

11. study the Bush family genealogy, but then he might learn his grandfather, Prescott Bush, financially profited from his involvement with the architects of Nazism.

12. become, like so many former elected officials, a high-paid lobbyist  and use his contacts and networks to influence legislation in favor of his wealthy clients.

13. work for a gun manufacturer or the NRA,since he was the genius who gave Florida "Stand Your Ground" legislation.

Most recently Jeb has assured us he "eats nails for breakfast," I'm presuming he considers that a "really cool thing" to do. In that case, I have nothing to offer, except maybe milk and sugar.