Although I have the nasty habit of recommending books to my friends, former friends, and just about anyone who will listen, I have compiled a list of books I do not recommend to anyone. In fact I would not wish these books on my many enemies.
The books in this list are in no particular order because they are equally devoid of merit.
1. Principles of Ethical Journalism by Rupert Murdoch
2. Pollution Solutions by the Koch Bros.
3. Proper Etiquette When Addressing a Co-ed by Rush Limbaugh
4. Etch-a-Sketch Made Simple by Mitt Romney
5. The Art of Silence by Joe Biden
6. Pedophile Prevention by Cardinal Bernard Law
7. Firearm Safety by Dick Cheney
8. Recipes For Dog Meat by Barack Obama
9. Geography Made Simple by Sarah Palin
10.How to Choose a Vice Presidential Running-mate by John McCain
Although I am told the Catholic Church no longer issues an Index of Forbidden Books, I am issuing my own Index and any books listed anywhere on this page should be burned in a conflagration of which Savonarola would have been proud.
11. Effective Contraceptive Techniques by Rick Santorum
12. Hair Styling by Donald Trump
13. Techniques for Transporting Canines by Mitt Romney
14. Principles of a Just War by George W. Bush
15. Principles of Democracy by Czar Vladimir Putin
16. Women's Health Care by Archbishop Timothy Nolan of New York
17. Immigration Solution: Self-Deportation by Mitt Romney
18. How to Save the American Auto Industry by Mitt Romney
19. Marital Fidelity by Newt Gingrich
20. Feeding the Hungry of the World by Ron Paul
My ancestors would not be proud that I am "banning books," but these titles speak for themselves and beg to be banned, burned, or otherwise destroyed.
2 comments:
Great posting, Ron! I love the titles you've come up with. Nonetheless, some of these books have got to be very small works. For example, Palin's book of geography or Newt's tome on marital fidelity. That's gotta be a one-pager. I'm assuming that the GW Bush thing is a coloring book? Just wondering. However, I must thank you for alerting me to these books so that the next time I'm in a second hand bookshop, I'll rmember not to look for them.
Gene
Love your selection of books never to be read and also to be banned! This is from Dick Kramer. You break me up all the time, Ron [aka FLASH] but I cannot comment publicly on FB because of diocesan personnel who are also FB "friends" and blab a lot! Hang in there and keep up your great work. It is sickening to listen to the Tea Party people and the right wingers - much like pre-Hitler Germany in many ways! And it is just as bad when a bunch of priests get together....so many are really into the FAR FAR right wing...all in the name of being faithful to the Gospel. Vatican II is dying I am afraid....and OUR retiring Bishop (Thomas Doran) actually said in a homily a couple years ago that "the II Vatican Council was a mistake!" What balls!
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